someone's story.

We think we're invincible, and that our world will never fall apart. We defy every rule we've ever been given, and when nothing happens - we do it again. We are destructive. We hurt others, hurt ourselves, put our lives in jepoardy and make life-altering decisions that we can never erase, never be rid of. We brush our mistakes aside and tell ourselves they will never happen again. We look at the bad things that happen to other people and think - wow that sucks, but that would never happen to me, or any of my friends. Yes, we think we're invincible, but then it happens to us.

It was in the middle of the first semester just as the leaves were beginning to change color and the air became to smell like autumn. Crisp leaves fell and scents of cinnamon and pumpkin spice begin to welcome in the Thanksgiving season. The weather was colder but not harsh enough to bite your skin. Perfect running weather, and great for football season. Everyone was anxious for break to come around, for many it had been months since they had seen they're closest friends. Just a couple more weeks and then we would all be home. Or so we thought.

I got the call on Tuesday morning: 9:05 A.M. It was her Aunt Lindsey and I remember her voice calm but soft. I had never met her before, or heard her voice, but I could tell from her first, "Hi is this Angie?" that something was wrong. I responded with a yes and asked who was calling. She told me who she was and then simply said: Holly is gone. At first I was confused... of course she was gone. Gone away to the University of California, but she would be back for thanksgiving, I had talked to her just a couple days ago. But then her voice had continued: She killed herself last night. The funeral is going to be on Friday. I know it would be a lot to Dan and Kathleen if you could be there. I'm so sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I sat there silent. And all I could say was, of course. And then I hung up the phone. My roommate looked at me and asked me who had called. I couldn't say a word. I grabbed my phone and walked out of the room. Down the hall to the lounge I opened the door and sat on the couch. I was alone and unable to comprehend what I had just been told.

Things like that don't happen to us. Not to our group of friends. Never. It couldn't be true... it just couldn't. So many suicides had taken place in our town while we were in high school. We had all sworn up and down we could never do something like that to the people we loved. We had all agreed how selfish it was. We had all sat in disbelief and then we had moved on with our lives. We had been happy. We had had some of the greatest times anyone could ask for. High school was the time of our lives - filled with fun, parties, tears, laughter, relationships, break-ups, and most of all the comfort that we had each other. And that we always would.

And now she was gone. What else could I do? I got on my phone and started calling them all. Hunter. Kyle. Wes. Lance. Jeremy. Kristin. Courtney. Whitney. Morgan. Dori. Stace. Pete. Many of their reactions turned out to be similar to my own. We couldn't talk about it. It didn't make sense. And it was just too strange and unacceptable to talk about right then. All we knew is that we were all gonna be at that funeral. There was no other option. We were going to see each other sooner than we had planned. But she wasn't going to be there...

I guess we're not invincible. And the things that you think aren't going to happen to you - well thats not always the case. Bad things happen to good people, even though they're not supposed to. The world shoudn't work like that, but it does. The world is a messed up place filled with depression, rage, anger, abuse, suicide, death, hurt, pain, and heartache. The sooner you accept the fact that you're not invincible, and neither are the people around you, the better you're going to survive. We have to cope with unexpected, and we have to do it with love, care, and patience. We have to take as many steps as we can to make this world a better place. But not by thinking we're invincible and defying all the rules. We have to do it by embracing those we love and showing them we're always gonna be there - no matter what. This world is a crappy place - but hand in hand, we can make it great.