rollercoaster

here it goes again. the never-ending rollercoaster. slowly it is moving up, higher and higher. please just get it over with. the anticipation is too much to bear. everyone knows it is coming. the drop. the fall. the tears accompained by no explanation. the edge is getting closer. eyes tightly shut... just do it already. oh stop. scared again. these feelings will never come easily. and when they end, the rollercoaster will again have a rider. that one faithful rider who lives for the drop. without the fall - who would they be?

she lets them pick her up and do as they please. slowly they move further... getting more and move involved. she lives for the antcipation. the nights beside the phone wondering when he will call. she knows what that call means. when it comes she becomes nervous, like she has never done this before. yet the whole world could tell you she is quite experienced.

and so it begins. first with a hello and a smile. the tv or soft music plays in the background. they begin to flirt until he makes his move. the move he know will be greeted with a responding gesture. that first kiss always makes the rollercoaster start rolling. her mind whirls with anticipation as their tongues touch and their mouths engage in this familiar, yet new experience. for each one is different, and each time is exciting. after a few moments, his hands will move to her breasts. she does not show any signs of resistance. she does not play hard to get. in fact she waits for more. oh please. more. don't stop now.

that moment when she feels the top button of her jeans release is when she knows. its coming. they are started to move faster. hurry. keep going. and they always do. why stop when farther is an option? people never stop wanting more. a little is never good enough. there always has to be a push for that next step. one more mile. something bigger. and once that goal is achieved, there is no going back.

and so she gets on. again and again. riding the rollercoaster. she lives for the anticipation. the climax. the pleasure. the thrill of something familiar yet unique and new each time. they all eagerly let her climb aboard. she is beautiful. she is willing. she is available - no strings attached. yes, she will fall. she will cry. but that is something they will never know. something irrelevant... because no matter how much it leaves her feeling empty. she just can't stop riding.